Do you ever ask yourself, “Am I a good mother?” Do you wonder how can I be a better mom? Do you look at other moms and compare yourself by thinking she’s a better mom than I am?
Don’t compare yourself to other moms. Be the mom that God made you to be. Use all your talents, life lessons, skills and abilities to be an amazing mom. If you want to be a better mom, work on these 5 qualities of a good mother.
What are the qualities of a good mother?
- They teach their children God’s Word
- They pray for their children
- They are patient
- They are intentional
- They are inspiring
Good Mothers teach their children the God’s Word and their Christian faith
One thing I have realized in the last year is the importance of Bible training for our children from their moms. As we have been homeschooling this year, I have had the opportunity to teach my kids Bible lessons and daily Bible insights. I can show them personally how to apply these lesson their daily lives.
As parents, one of our most important responsibilities is to teach our Christian faith to our children. If we want our children to carry forward our Christian values and beliefs, we have to teach these values to our children. We can’t depend on churches, teachers or schools to teach our children our values. If we don’t teach our children our values someone else will teach their values to our children.
We live in a culture that is a fight for the hearts and minds of young men, women, and children. Moses gave us this instruction in,
Deuteronomy 11:19, “You shall teach them (the law and ways of Christian faith) to your children, speaking of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.” bold added by me.
When you think about it, these words from Moses tell us an easy way to we can teach the Bible and our Christian values to our kids. It should be natural. It should be part of our every day lives. It’s part of everything we do all the time.
As you start to look around you will notice simple ways you can teach your kids Christian faith every day. You will find many times throughout the day you can give your kids examples of how to live the Christian life and teach the Christian faith.
Remember, knowing Jesus is more important than knowing math, history, or language arts.
Good Mothers pray for their children
Kids need prayer period. We need help from God and the Holy Spirit to guide our children. We plant the seeds every day as we teach them God’s Word and right from wrong. But it’s only through the power of the God’s Holy Spirit penetrating their hearts will they receive the message.
If you are struggling with your kids today, start with prayer. Take the time to pray for each one specifically and individually. Ask God for help with the needs of each one.
Change doesn’t happen instantly. But with prayer, you have let go of the problem and the burden. Over time, prayer changes us, too.
What should you pray for your kids?
- Pray for any specific needs they have problems, struggles or health needs.
- Pray they will know Jesus personally
- Pray they will be strong in their own Christian faith as they grow and become adults
- Pray they will make good decisions based on God’s wisdom and truth they have been taught
- Pray they will be a good example to others
Good Mothers are patient (or work on it daily)
I have a confession. My kids tell me I yell too much. Even when I think I am not yelling they will say I am yelling. Some days, it’s a real struggle for me not to yell. When I have asked my kids to do something 3, 4, 8 times, it’s hard not to be frustrated, right? You know they heard you and have chosen to ignore you.
Does this ever happen to you?
Yesterday, we were a hot mess at our house. We are trying to wrap up the school year and I think the kids have summer fever. But it’s important to finish all the last school assignments, too.
Keeping them focused and on school tasks this week has been a struggle. Yesterday, nothing seemed to go right. I was in meetings for work. They had school assignments, but they were not focused. Schoolwork was not getting done.
Guess what happened? Mom lost it. I am deeply frustrated with myself that it takes so little to push me to the point of yelling.
I can’t give you a magic bullet or easy solution to fix it. But when I feel myself starting to get frustrated, I focus on this Bible verse,
“A soft answer turneth away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger”, Proverbs 15:1.
So when I start to raise my voice, I remember that angry tone will only make the kids angrier, resentful and defensive, too. I am not perfect at giving a soft answer, but I am improving and I work on it every day.
Remember, when you yell or raise your voice, it’s more likely the person you are speaking to will respond in a like manner (even your kids). But, when we speak in soft voices (even if we are firm), it’s harder to continue the yelling.
If you are struggling with yelling and getting frustrated with your children’s behavior, let’s keep working on this one together.
Good Mothers are intentional with their time
One thing our kids truly want from us is intentional time with them. Sure, if you are having a great time or doing something fun snap a few quick selfies so you can remember the day, but when you plan time together as a family or with your kids ask them to set aside the electronics for a while and just have fun together.
Check out these ideas for family fun (they summer, but you can do many of these things year round):
How can I be more intentional with my kids?
- Have a daily reading time together (reading aloud is fun even with older kids). Even if they say they don’t want to, if you find a great book, kids love reading aloud.
- Cook dinner together (easy dinners count)
- Share what happened during your day at dinner time (have a no electronics rule at the dinner table)
- Have a family game night once a week or just once a month
- Do something fun like go to a movie, hang out at the mall or just get a fro-yo treat one evening (the girls and I have so much fun going to new movies together)
Good Mothers are inspirational
When you look back at your childhood and teen years, who do you remember as inspiring you and helping you?
With little children, it’s easy to see how important mom is to them. Remember when you would drop your kids off at daycare or leave them with a babysitter how they would cry when you left? But when they get a little older most tweens and teens would never admit it, but moms are very important to them, too.
For little ones, we cheer them and encourage them to take their first steps, say their first words. But older kids need encouragement and inspiration, too. The struggles in life get much harder for tweens and teens.
We can be an inspiration to our kids in so many ways. We can encourage their interests and help them learn new things. We can be the biggest cheerleader at recitals and sports events. We can talk to them quietly when they are sad or have their feelings hurt.
We can all be inspirational moms by looking for little ways we can encourage our kids each day. Even a little word or sentence can make all the difference.
Wouldn’t it be awesome to be remembered for your inspiring words and quotes? What if one day your kids would say, “My mom always said … and your kids fill in your best inspirational words.”
Five simple ways you can be a better mom:
- Teach your children scripture daily
- Pray for them
- Use soft answers (even when we are frustrated)
- Give your children intentional focused time
- Be inspiring and encouraging
Mom, you are working hard. You need a little inspiration, too. This is one of my all-time favorite posts, 10 Bible Promises for Overwhelmed Moms.
Motherhood is a hard job. Don’t give up and don’t stop believing. We plant seeds daily, but often it takes many years to see the results of our hard work.